Parenting Help to Deal with Defiant Children

Does your child not follow your instructions or disobey you?

Defiance and disrespectful is a common behavioral problem in children. It is your responsibility to use the right tools and measures to bring improvements to your child behavior before it gets late for you.

Here is some parenting advice to deal with a defiant child:

Get to the Root of his Behavior

Keep a track of your child’s defiance and try to identify the causes and triggers. Once you find a pattern or a common cause, you can take measures or look for solutions to adjust situations to bring positive changes in your child’s behavior.

Try to avoid situations that make your child furious. For example, if your child cannot handle too many tasks at a time, schedule the next task only after he/she completes the first. You can reward your child for his/her efforts to motivate him/her for the next initiative.  

Be Understanding

Understand your child’s psychology. Do not expect your kid to be polite and humble all the time. Defiance to a certain level is normal in children but do not let things go out of control. Children need love, care and attention. When they do not get these, they tend to get defiant, aggressive, and even violent to grab attention.

Try to respond to the defiance with maturity and understanding. For example, when you ask your child to join you for dinner, he may simply refuse and then yell and cry when you force him to obey. In such situations, keep a strict control on your temper, give him a hug and tell him you understand it's hard to leave his friend’s company, but dinner is ready and it is good to eat with the family.

It makes him feel that you are on his side, which ultimately strengthens child parent relationships.

Reinforce Good Behavior

It is not good to keep criticizing your child every time he misbehaves or display bad behavior. Appreciating the preschooler for his good behavior is also effective in inspiring children. For example, saying "Thank you for hanging up your coat!", "you are a great help” “you are a very good child” will encourage the child to do more good things in his/her daily life.

Discipline doesn't mean controlling your child. Child discipline is to teach the child to differentiate between right and wrong and control himself every time he feels tempted towards taking the wrong path. Your child should do the right thing because he/she is willing to do it, not because he is afraid of punishment.